you're definitely a redneck if...

Ok, people. We all know Mississippi has its share of rednecks, too many of whom revel in the name while the remainder of us refuse to plaster a Dale Jr. sticker on our cars and try to maintain some semblance of grace and style. The recent “Redneck Games” in Athens, Texas would most certainly be a sort of backwoods mecca to this conspicuous demographic.

Now, I was a member of the Starkville Academy class who started the Mud Bowl (I did not attend, mind you), and I lived in the Delta for two years, so I have seen plenty of ‘necks. It seems as though the citizens in this typically quiet, small Texas town are not particularly fond of the Texas Muddy Gras, which takes place occasionally in an ATV field. I particularly like the Mattress Chuck, a field event of sorts where drunks load the beds of their trucks with a mattress and a boozed friend and attempt to throw the mattress as far as possible. Wow.

And this is no small gathering – 6,000 mullet-sporting, wife beater-wearing guys and gals attended this year’s four-day event. And, as if it weren’t redneck enough, Oscar, the founder of the games, could face jail time for not obtaining a permit for the event.

I’m just glad it’s not in Mississippi. Yet.