It's hard to believe that I'll no longer hear Jack Cristil on the radio for a Mississippi State sporting event. Out of the Bulldogs' 110 football seasons, Jack has called 58 of them. He's one of the true characters in college athletics, and he'll be sorely missed.
Not that he was nice all the time; his one-liners are legendary. He saw some really nasty football and basketball in his day, but here are some of the best from the 2008 Egg (Toilet) Bowl...
“The QB and the receiver weren’t on the same page there; but hey, it’s only week eleven.”
“Handoff to Dixon. And Dixon is murdered on the play.”
After Ole Miss went up 17-0 in the 1st Quarter: “They are going to have to send in their second kickoff coverage unit because the first unit is going to tire out with all of these kickoffs.”
“Ole Miss has just scored and we don’t know who scored because No. 85 isn’t listed on their roster. It’s academic at this point.”
“It’s third down and so long, you will need surveying equipment to see how much is needed for a first down.”
“There are only 45 seconds left. Maybe Ole Miss won’t score another touchdown. In the 1st quarter that is.”
“Coming up on the end of the quarter – the third quarter, that is. We’ve still got another one to play.
“At the end of the third quarter, Ole Miss barely out in front, 38-0.”
“Ole Miss has punted once today for a grand total of 12 yards. They ought to improve on that with this next punt.” (Laughter in the background)
“Let’s punt it again. McAdams has to punt it a lot in his final game as a Bulldog.”
In the 4th Quarter: “For the record both teams have all of their timeouts left. So, that ought to make it fun.”
“Well, what do you know? The Rebels have put a couple of backup linemen in the game.”
“Mercifully, the clock continues to run.”
“About 3 minutes left, many fans have long been gone. In fact, some of them are probably already home by now.”
“Chris Relf can throw it long. He cannot throw it accurately, but he can throw it long.”
“Well, that’s only a loss of 9 there. So, it’s only third and 19.”
“A great many of the 55,000 fans have left the game now (45-0), they might even be home now watching on TV”.
“It’s 4th down and 24 yards to go, this ought to dictate a punt right now.”
John Correro: “One can only hope so, Jack.”
“Well, the Bulldogs take a delay of game. That backs them up to their 4 where it will be fourth and 31. We just wanted to make sure McAdams had plenty of room to kick the ball because he has such a powerful leg.”
“That’s it. Ballgame over. Ole Miss noses out Mississippi State, 45-0.”
“Sonic drive of the game….My drive home to Tupelo, MS I guarantee you that is my drive of the game.” (Then he proceeded to give his home address.)
After Ole Miss was twice flagged for celebration after scoring: “That’s terrible, throwing a flag on a kid that just made a great play. Let the kid celebrate a little.”
Only Jack could make me smile after such a horrid game.
Not that he was nice all the time; his one-liners are legendary. He saw some really nasty football and basketball in his day, but here are some of the best from the 2008 Egg (Toilet) Bowl...
“The QB and the receiver weren’t on the same page there; but hey, it’s only week eleven.”
“Handoff to Dixon. And Dixon is murdered on the play.”
After Ole Miss went up 17-0 in the 1st Quarter: “They are going to have to send in their second kickoff coverage unit because the first unit is going to tire out with all of these kickoffs.”
“Ole Miss has just scored and we don’t know who scored because No. 85 isn’t listed on their roster. It’s academic at this point.”
“It’s third down and so long, you will need surveying equipment to see how much is needed for a first down.”
“There are only 45 seconds left. Maybe Ole Miss won’t score another touchdown. In the 1st quarter that is.”
“Coming up on the end of the quarter – the third quarter, that is. We’ve still got another one to play.
“At the end of the third quarter, Ole Miss barely out in front, 38-0.”
“Ole Miss has punted once today for a grand total of 12 yards. They ought to improve on that with this next punt.” (Laughter in the background)
“Let’s punt it again. McAdams has to punt it a lot in his final game as a Bulldog.”
In the 4th Quarter: “For the record both teams have all of their timeouts left. So, that ought to make it fun.”
“Well, what do you know? The Rebels have put a couple of backup linemen in the game.”
“Mercifully, the clock continues to run.”
“About 3 minutes left, many fans have long been gone. In fact, some of them are probably already home by now.”
“Chris Relf can throw it long. He cannot throw it accurately, but he can throw it long.”
“Well, that’s only a loss of 9 there. So, it’s only third and 19.”
“A great many of the 55,000 fans have left the game now (45-0), they might even be home now watching on TV”.
“It’s 4th down and 24 yards to go, this ought to dictate a punt right now.”
John Correro: “One can only hope so, Jack.”
“Well, the Bulldogs take a delay of game. That backs them up to their 4 where it will be fourth and 31. We just wanted to make sure McAdams had plenty of room to kick the ball because he has such a powerful leg.”
“That’s it. Ballgame over. Ole Miss noses out Mississippi State, 45-0.”
“Sonic drive of the game….My drive home to Tupelo, MS I guarantee you that is my drive of the game.” (Then he proceeded to give his home address.)
After Ole Miss was twice flagged for celebration after scoring: “That’s terrible, throwing a flag on a kid that just made a great play. Let the kid celebrate a little.”
Only Jack could make me smile after such a horrid game.
