"I've discovered that my own little postage stamp of native soil was worth writing about and that I would never live long enough to exhaust it."
- William Faulkner
Friday, November 18, 2011
the psychology of i'm sorry
It sucks to mess up.
Like, really sucks.
To know that you’ve missed the mark on something or disappointed someone is one of life’s stings. Whenever I do it, I literally feel sick. My tummy hurts, my palms start to sweat and I can’t think of anything else. I’m not sure if it’s the oldest child syndrome or just my personal anxiety level, but something in me can’t let it go until I know (for dead certain) those I’ve wronged have. Most of the time, I’m way more hurt by it than the people I transgress, but that doesn’t make me feel any better. Nothing makes me feel worse than to disappoint someone or hurt someone’s feelings. It’s the pits.
If nothing else, I try to take it as an opportunity to really apologize to someone. For me, an effective apology can wipe away a multitude of mistakes, but just like your Love Language, everyone likes to hear “I’m sorry” differently. And you know how much I subscribe to the Love Language psychology…
I took this quiz a few months ago, and I think it’s as interesting as the Love Language quiz. (Haven’t taken it yet? Get enlightened here.) Choose how you would react in a series of scenarios and then find out how you like to be apologized to. Fascinating and so helpful if you can get your friends and family to take it, too!
Sorry if this is a heavy subject for a Friday, but friends can talk about this stuff, right?